Examples of Making Amends in Recovery Addiction Resources

Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable. How blessed we are to become free from our past, and given the gift to help free another. It is a clear and purposeful act designed to clear up a problem from the past. I tend to hide the memory of past transgressions under the ever-handy umbrella of “Didn’t do it if I don’t remember”.

How to Start Step 9

Step Nine states that we make amends “except when to do so would injure them or others.” We don’t want our actions to cause further damage, harm or stress. In those cases, we can make amends in a broader sense by taking actions like donating money, volunteering our time or providing care. For example, we might intend to go to a friend’s birthday party, but in actuality, we fail to show up for the event. While we might apologize later for missing the party, our apology consists of words rather than actions or changed behavior.

The Role of Step 9 of the Twelve Steps

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is one of the oldest, continuous organizations that have offered those struggling with alcohol addiction assistance in achieving and maintaining recovery. Their main methodology is known as the 12 Steps, and breaks down the path to recovery into regimented levels. This was a good start for me but there were still a lot of “I’s” as I experienced this step. As with all the steps I have found for me, that as time moves on they reveal more and more to me. The more I practiced this step the more I found out how much healing comes from it and not just for me. Making amends is challenging, but the outcome can be one of the most rewarding parts of recovery.

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) Step 9: Make Amends to People You’ve Harmed

• Although step nine can be difficult, participants should remember that if it were easy, everyone would be doing it.
• This ongoing nature of making amends can lead to self-healing by alleviating the stress tied to previous behaviors, potentially averting relapse.
• I recognize that you may not trust my intentions or my ability to change today and I do not blame you, but my hope is that over time the changes in my behavior will demonstrate my commitment to recovery.
• Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

Step 8 of AA is primarily about forgiveness — making peace with others and yourself. Stepping back from a life of alcoholism and seeing all the damage you caused can be devastating. This is a key moment, when you’ll finally be coming to terms and learning how to live with what’s salvageable in your life, even if those things are no longer the same. It takes courage to continue the 12 amends definition aa Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. This step does carry a condition—except when to do so would injure them or others.

Repairing previous harm also assists in helping you rebuild important relationships which may have been impacted by addiction. In Step 9, participants acknowledge the negative impact their addiction had on others and commit to direct amends where possible. These actions demonstrate a new way of living and help develop accountability, paving the way for Step 10, where amends are made immediately upon realizing harm. Sometimes, trying to make things right can cause others distress.

• The script also aids in initiating the amends process with an outreach message to confirm if the person is open to receiving an apology.
• It is important to take your time and be intentional with your actions while working this Step.
• He also said that he thought I was silly as a pet coon, which I did not like very much.
• I must add that, as previously stated, I came awfully close to drinking about two weeks before starting the step process.

Recovery Coaching

Many people find that the support they receive from AA meetings helps them prepare to make amends. Talking with your sober community about your history with drugs or alcohol can help you identify what you need to make amends for. By confronting past mistakes, you begin to put the past behind and embrace a brighter, healthier future. Arrange to speak with the other person – while COVID-19 has complicated this process, making amends face-to-face is encouraged. If appropriate, you can let the person know how amends are related to staying sober. However, your primary goal should be to acknowledge that you have done wrong and would like to make up for it.

But to rectify this damage, we can’t maintain the same “me first” attitude that many of the other steps require. However, there are situations where it might not be appropriate. If approaching the other person opens up old wounds or re-traumatizes them, making amends isn’t advisable.

• Other people who have completed this task might tell you how freeing it is, and while that may be true, trying to take a shortcut is is only limiting the power that this step will bring to your recovery.
• A lakefront oasis providing a continuum of personalized addiction treatment surrounded by scenic views with private rooms, luxury amenities, and group outings.
• Some might be too tested by prior behaviors and actions that they simply need space.
• Addiction has the ability to irrevocably sever the most intimate bonds of family and friendship.
• This signifies the acceptance of one’s responsibility for harmful actions.

It requires acknowledging past mistakes, expressing genuine regret, and committing to change. Crafting a personalized AA Amends Script can provide a structured guide for this process, ensuring that your acknowledgment of wrongdoing, expression of regret, and commitment to change are articulated. Developing your amends script shouldn’t be an isolated endeavor. A sponsor plays a critical role, offering guidance and expertise during script development and approach.